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Love is Authenticity and Finding Your Voice

This summer I took a huge leap and became involved in the Connection Revolution‘s 3rd Annual World-Changing Writer’s Workshop. This course radiates authenticity and encourages you to write from your heart. It urges you to dig deep to uncover your own stories and to share them with the world. It allows space and opportunity for connection and honest dialogue with other creative, soulful people. It makes ample room for the pouring out of ideas, dreams, fears, and unique perspectives.

I have so much anticipation and excitement to be able to create more space in my life for my writing, to explore my authentic voice, to calm my doubts and apprehension, to create community, to focus my energy (if that’s even possible), and to grow and grow and grow. 

When I was young, I wrote furiously and without restraint. I lost this habit along the way. I became judgmental and fearful of my potential. I was too afraid to put my thoughts to paper. I hesitated with every word. I censored every truth. I was ashamed of myself and so desperately wanted to be someone else. I didn’t think that my words were eloquent or important or interesting enough.

For years  I struggled. For years I felt guilty because deep down, I retained my passion and desire for writing and self-expression.

This Spring, I wrote out a list of Summer goals. The last entry on my list was that I wanted to write ‘at least 3 articles to submit to magazines or blogs’. I am not a goal oriented person, but a couple days later, I found myself jotting down ideas in my journal. I started to flesh out the stories and perspectives I wanted to tell. Within the next couple of weeks, I had handwritten rough copies of 2 articles (one on creativity and the other on finding joy). I am going to be published in this GORGEOUS e-magazine that is infused with so many of the things that LIGHT ME UP.

I had finally found my spark again!

And holy shit, it was such a relief.

I felt free from many of my old (self-imposed) restraints. I felt lifted from some of my old fears.

I have blogged on and off for many years. My other blogs have been very personal ones where I have just written about anything and everything, no matter how raw or irrelevant. With this current space, I still tread slowly and carefully at times. I want to reveal both the joyous and passionate parts of myself, as well as the terrified and dark parts.

I want to infuse my personality into what I create (but I still worry about how much I should swear or use so-called ‘vulgar’ words). I want to challenge people and push boundaries and talk about politics, but these parts of me still hold back – they still balk and submit to stifled silence (only partially peeking out from time to time), in favour of more ‘palatable’ experiences.

It is so much easier and safer to focus on happiness and beauty.

And though these things are oh-so present in my current life,
and though I absolutely live for small wonders (and wanders) and simple pleasures,
the darkness still creeps in sometimes,
the fear and the doubt and the utter immobilizing overwhelm of it all pays me regular visits.

I think we really honour ourselves when we admit these experiences – when we accept them, without censorship, without shame.

It’s so important, no essential, that we own our struggles and break down barriers
that we reach out to others, that we connect on more vulnerable and intimate levels,
that we understand that we are not alone,
and that there is so much strength and beauty in that.

I am still sifting through all my stories.
I am still learning to tell myself that they are worth sharing.

“To create connection with your stories, you have to hit “publish”.
You’ve been trained by a fearful society to keep your dark side to yourself.
You undersell your pain for fear of burdening others or complaining.
You find security in silence because no one can judge you or find you lacking

You hide the truth of your journal and pretend there’s only sunshine in your life.
You think your story isn’t important.

You’re wrong.

When you reveal the soft, scary parts of your soul,
you open yourself to connection.
There is always someone who lights up when they hear your story
because they’ve lived it, too.

We’re drawn to shared experience.
Even the most hermit-like introvert craves the feeling of community
that’s inspired by saying…
“Hey. Me, too.”

Speaking your truth adds a shining new thread to the
tapestry of human experience.
It ties you to every person who hears it, whether the
story reaches one person
or seven billion.
And because of that,
the world without stories would be a sad place.
We couldn’t relate to others without shared stories.
We would never understand another culture, absorb new knowledge,
find beauty in art, or invest in peace.
How miserable and lonely would that be?
The way we recognize our people, our community, our tribe
is through the stories they tell.
Because they are our stories.”

Ellie Di Julio – No  Shame (www.theheadologist.com)

Here is a small round-up of voices that radiate authenticity and speak their truths:

Authenticity Rocks: How to Radiate your own Voice

Owning your ‘freakiness’ 

The Kindness of Surrender

Can we just be honest?

Adventures in Depression 

What’s Your Story?

How do you tell your own stories? How do you push past fear? What is the one story you are aching to tell the world?

Here’s to being your awesome fucking self,

xo.

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16 thoughts on “Love is Authenticity and Finding Your Voice

  1. Great post – thanks for sharing! I love telling a good story and most times it comes from experience. I try to challenge myself, try new things and just push past the fear – easier said than done at times. I would love to share more about my childhood, but not ready to go there yet. Happy Sunday!

    1. Thanks a bunch for your thoughtful response! Ahh yeah, I’m still working on pushing past the fear (I’m still trying to figure out where the true fear/blockage comes from since I am generally very open at disclosing my life experiences and details! haha). And you are right, in order to share those deep parts of ourselves and our dark experiences, we have to feel safe – we have to be ready. Good luck on sharing your stories! Happy Monday (sarcastic woo!) 😉

  2. Oh geez…wiping up tears here. Your words, thoughts & heart were just what I needed. I’ve had a similar awakening in the last year. Thank you sharing. Connection is pretty freaking amazing!!

    1. Wow, your comment seriously made my day/made my heart tingle/made me smile. Thank you sososo much for sharing this. It’s incredible to know that my writing has some sort of impact.

      I’m totally rooting for you on your journey (I’m reading your blog right now and it’s so powerful & insightful!) The road to self-love is a emotionally draining (but also energizing!) one. High five to connection! I live for it xo.

    1. Thank you. The profanity issue is difficult because that’s just how I speak sometimes. I’m trying to maintain a style that honours my authentic voice, but well, tones it down a bit at times 🙂

    1. Yay, I am so happy that you read it, Pace! I was going to share it with the WCWW crowd, but hadn’t gotten around to it yet. You two are so inspiring! I feel totally aligned with your cause 🙂 *high five*

  3. So much of this resonated with me. I am so glad you have found your spark again and sharing it! And glad that I am too. Looking forward to hearing more about your journey.

  4. I’m doing the WCWW too, and it attracted me for the same reasons. It’s not a step-by-step course, if you follow A, B and C, you’ll achieve D (I usually get bored before I even start with A), but it is really about you and finding your voice and doing things your own way. Just listened the bonus call with Catherine Caine today and loved it: edit a lot, but do not censor!

    1. Oh awesome! So glad you stopped by 🙂 How are you finding the course so far? It’s been a giant motivator for me to start taking my writing more seriously (well, in a playful way!) and to start making steps towards creating something meaningful that I love (my dreams are starting to take some form – though the lines are still a bit blurry)…I completely agree with the appreciation for a lack of “instructions” and structure. It’s less stifling and more of a self-exploration 🙂 It’s such an amazing community with so many inspiring and interesting people. And yes! I love that message, “edit, but don’t censor”. Looking forward to connecting with you more!

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